I wanted to write the post about my trip to Singapore. Instead I keep getting distracted by all the thoughts about this week running through my head, all the little stories that don’t seem to have a conclusion or go anywhere.
the guys who saw a family of bedouins, shot the dad, and then told the kids to run, but didn’t shoot them.
The woman my dad talked to at a funeral tonight, who had a terrorist invade her home but then promise her they wouldn't shoot her kids because that wasn't muslim. He saw bananas on her table and asked if he could have one, like he was a guest, then threw the peel on the floor. Then he and his friends left, probably to go kill someone else, almost certainly to get killed themselves eventually by the IDF.
There’s so many things that are so much worse, the terrorists who did just indiscriminately kill and worse and then celebrate it. I try not to think about those, there’s just too much and it’s too horrible. I can’t sleep, and then I think about people in Gaza who have it so much worse, except I don’t see a way around it, it just makes me sick.
Thinking about bombing Gaza, where it seems like there's a missile launcher on every rooftop launching missiles at here that the air force needs to bring down, but also where it sometimes feels like they're just bombing indiscriminately and really, is there any other form when you're bombing people who hide their weapons behind civilians? How many of those civilians just want to be safe, and how many are proud to do their part to die as human shields for propaganda victories? They put their HQ in the basement of their hospital. How do you deal with something like that?
How do you not? It’s happening right now. There’s people in Israel who just love this excuse, because it justifies all their insane pro-settler opinions about how we just need to be more brutal and violent and unrestrained. The religious ones, who want this to be an excuse to clear out Gaza and build more settlements there like they did before, in the nineties. They probably hope the West Bank has a war like this too, so they can clear it out once and for all. How do you handle being on the same side of a war with people like that? Even if the other side has people who are worse, even if on the other side it's the worse people who are inside and here you can just tell yourself it's okay, people like you are restraining them.
All the weird americans leftists, probably not a huge amount in real life but vocal online, who seem to be totally fine with any amount of murder and terrorism so long as it's "their side" that does it, even when "their side" is people who'd happily kill them and the people they're killing are people they'd happily befriend.
I think about the cops at that party, the one the terrorists attacked. My brother talked to the survivors. They send the rental security guys told them to run to safety then fought a wave of heavily armed terrorists with just pistols. All of them were killed.
Eventually I just write something without a point, without really getting anywhere. Eventually I manage to sleep.
My thoughts are with you, but I find anything else I might say comes up short.